8-23-13

Took a nice walk today. My knee gave me some trouble but I survived. I need to clean my room tonight but first I might go to the store and grab a soda or something because I'm tired. :s I have to work at 8 in the morning tomorrow. Staying up late to clean my room tonight might not be the best idea in the world but I think I might do it anyway.

8-21-13

I believe in God and I believe he created me. But when I say I create myself I mean something different then "creation." I mean that how I act changes me in the view of others. I create myself in how I act.

I was talking about a Doctor Who tattoo I wanted. That had Bad Wolf with the DW being the Doctor Who style DW and under that it would say I create myself. I posted that on Facebook and one of my friends said that I don't create myself. That's not what I mean! In terms of Doctor Who and the scene with Rose as the Bad Wolf, I create myself.

8-18-13

I feel like I am going to be sick. My emotions got the better of me again and led me down another dead end I think. This whole thing with Joe was a bad idea to begin with. I can't believe I bought into it. He's such a nice guy but we're too different I think. Not to mention my damaged psyche is just a pain in the ass for anyone to deal with much less a guy who's already got enough on his plate as it is. I need to step back from this because it's going to hurt a lot if I keep going.

8-18-13

I'm lost. I don't feel like I know where I'm going anymore. I've always had a goal in the future that I was aiming for. Getting a out of the hospital, walking, driving, getting a job, going to Paris. Now I just don't know what to aim for. I'm mean sure I've got the goal of getting out of debt, and moving into an apartment, all that. But all of that seems like they are long term goals, I don't have any short term goals. Anything to keep my head turned in the right direction.

Then this whole thing with grandma is sending me into a tail spin. I'm so hurt, I can't believe how little my own grandmother actually knows me.

8-16-13

Quit Discovery. I just couldn't handle it. It was stressing me out so much. I was feeling sick all the time, I was tired all the time, I kept having to change schedules at Home Depot and so it was risking my job over there I think. I'm going to be happier back down to one job. Paying off bills isn't worth that stress.

8-11-13

I work at Discovery today from 11 to 7. Hurray. Though their schedule confuses me. I know I need this job but I wish I had a job that had a regular schedule.

8-5-13

Today I work at The Depot and then I go on lunch and go to my orientation at Discovery. I was freaking out because I was scheduled to work at Home Depot when I was supposed to be going to my orientation at Discovery. So I talked to Margarito about it and he said just take an hour lunch and if it's going to take longer than an hour just call them and tell them and they'll just take care of it then. He's left word with the Head Cashier that he approved this and I am very very thankful. Cause I need both jobs badly.